And All That Jazz Episode 16
Dora accompanied Lizzy to Winson Green on the day of Charlie’s release, waiting across the road as the two embraced.
Charlie put his hand to Lizzy’s cheek and she’d leaned into him, the gesture so intimate Dora had to look away.
Later the same day she bought two tickets for a concert at the town hall as a thank-you to Vincent, and as an apology.
The weather stayed fine and they’d walked through Calthorpe Park afterwards, through avenues of trees tinged with autumn colour.
They’d walked arm in arm and it had felt like the most natural thing.
Now the four of them were to have an afternoon in the garden, and Dora was looking forward to it.
She had more energy than she’d had for years, as if she were emerging from a stupor, slowly learning how to live again.
There was a knock at the front door and the click of Mrs Knox’s heels on the hall tiles.
Seconds later, the parlour door opened and a flustered Mrs Knox hurried inside.
“Madam, Mrs Cashmore is here to see you.”
“Mother?” Dora’s heart gave a sickening lurch.
“Yes, madam. She’s rather –”
“Dora! I must speak with you.”
Thirza Cashmore breezed into the room, with Mrs Knox stumbling to one side to avoid being pushed out of the way.
Thirza gave the housekeeper a glare.
“Tea,” she ordered.
Mrs Knox’s eyebrows shot up and Dora forced a smile.
“Please, Mrs Knox,” Dora requested.
The housekeeper hustled away, closing the door harder than usual behind her.
Dora took a deep breath, trying not to let panic get the better of her.
“Mother, I wasn’t expecting you,” she said.
“I’m sure you were not.” Thirza lowered herself into the nearest chair. “Do sit down. You’re looming.”
Without thinking, Dora did as she was told.
“You need to explain yourself,” Thirza said.
Nerves buzzed over Dora like a swarm of ants.
“Why is that?” she asked.
“Why?” Thirza snapped. “You’ve been making a spectacle of yourself.”
“Well, that is –”
“I met Drury’s sister for lunch and she took great delight in telling me that you and Elizabeth visited an inmate at the prison –”
Dora licked her lips, tried to speak but failed.
“– that you secured the release of some criminal, and yesterday –” Thirza paled “– you met him.”
Dora had been so caught up in helping Charlie that it hadn’t occurred to her that Mother would find out.
Now Thirza looked down her nose at Dora, her lip curled in disgust.
“Why?” Thirza said. “Of all the humiliations. And to pull Freddie Underhill into this nonsense, too.”
Finally Dora found her voice.
“It was Freddie’s fault. If he hadn’t lied –”
“You are so naive, Dora,” her mother interrupted her. “How could Freddie have stolen anything?
“He’s an Underhill. One of the oldest families in this county. It’s far more likely he’s humouring this infatuation of Lizzy’s –”
“Infatuation?” Dora said.
“– and took the blame to please her,” Thirza went on. “Not that she’ll be grateful.
“Lizzy should have married Freddie years ago, as I suggested, and we might have avoided this.”
In some ways her mother was right.
If Lizzy had been quiet and biddable, as Dora herself had been, she might have married Freddie to keep the peace.
There would have been no telephone exchange, no jazz club, no flat with Beatrice Winborn.
Lizzy would have been at home with her husband, raising children.
Domesticated. Obedient.
Indignation kicked through Dora, pulling her to her feet.
She’d been the first to judge Lizzy’s life, but over the previous weeks she’d grown to see things differently.
With a pang, she realised that for the first time she genuinely loved her sister for who she was.
Dora’s mouth opened, closed and opened again.
Thirza sighed.
“Do close your mouth. You resemble a landed salmon,” she commented.
Dora always went along with whatever her mother said.
Disagreeing with people was unpleasant, and Dora had always believed that ladies should be pleasant and agreeable.
But since meeting Vincent she had changed.
Her heart hammered so hard it felt like it might beat a hole in her chest.
“I don’t think I will close my mouth, actually,” she stated.
Thirza’s own mouth dropped open.
“I beg your pardon.”
“I said, I shan’t be quiet,” Dora went on. “I’ve come to realise that the way you view the world is not the way things are any more.”
Thirza was about to speak, but Dora raised her hand.
“Please, don’t interrupt as I have more to say.” A faint feeling rushed to her head.
“Firstly,” Dora continued began, “just because the Underhills can trace their family back to William the Conqueror doesn’t make them good people.
“Freddie did lie and he might have let that boy go to prison for nothing.”
Thirza shifted in her chair.
“Charlie Tonks is not a criminal; he’s a barman in a jazz club,” Dora added. “He’s rather sweet and he was brave during the war.
“You must reconcile yourself to him because he and Lizzy are in love.”
Thirza gasped and excitement juddered through Dora.
“You raised me to think I had to be pretty and not have any thoughts of my own,” she continued, “or I’d become an old spinster.
“But that’s just not true, because people like me for who I am and how I think.
“In fact, there’s one man who likes me very much, and I believe he’ll ask me to marry him,” Dora went on. “And when he does, I’m going to say yes.”
The strength went from Dora’s legs and she sat heavily in her seat.
The door swung open and Mrs Knox entered, carrying a tea tray.
She looked from mother to daughter, then put the tray on the table and hurried away.
As the door closed, Thirza cleared her throat.
“Is that all you have to say?” she asked.
It was the first time Dora had ever seen her mother look shaken.
She felt a pang of sorrow for how baffling the world must be for her, with the old steadfast values burned away, and new ones rising from their ashes.
Dora pulled herself up straight.
“For now, Mother,” she replied.
Thirza stood up, though Dora could see the effort it took her.
“Very well.” Thirza turned the handle of the door and stepped into the hall.
“I shall visit on Sunday as usual,” Dora called from behind her.
Her mother turned, nodded and walked away.
Dora slumped back in her chair, exhausted.
To be continued…